Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
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