I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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