just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
A+ Viking dick
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