I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize