My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
