Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
