dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
