He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
