Apparently you make a good broom.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
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