I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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