Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You dont lie about slip and slides
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
