ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
