thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
