i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
