do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
