i just wanna soil my oats bro
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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