Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
