Dual....:-)
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
