Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
