If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm at about main and main street
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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