in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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