I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize