I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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