Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize