were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
