Rumble strips road head = magical
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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