if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
