She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
