she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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