Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
