Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Randomize
