yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize
