I just saw a hot homeless man
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
