Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
