he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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