Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
