after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i drank out of a bidet.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
