i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I just gift wrapped bread.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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