I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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