Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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