The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
