We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Never underestimate the power of titties
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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