names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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