P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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