dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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