i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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