I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
