I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
