Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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