On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Girls should come with a carfax report
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize